Tackling Safety Behaviors – Part 2

Tacking Safety Behaviors - Part 2
Taking Action: How to Notice
​and Challenge Safety Behaviors
by Hayden Beach

We've learned how safety behaviors can be harmful and hold us back from reaching our full potential. Safety behaviors are actions we take to prevent our fears or anxiety. It's important to remember that the goal isn’t to eliminate anxiety altogether, but rather to reduce our reliance on these behaviors so that we can grow and become more confident. This week we’re going to get started with learning how to drop these pesky behaviors and adapt to stressful and anxious situations. Getting rid of these tendencies is much easier said than done, but here are a few ways we can turn our attention to these behaviors and address them:

Step 1: Awareness
Recognizing some of the ways these behaviors manifest in your own life is the first step. Start by making a list of your safety behaviors and when they occur.
If you're unsure of where to start, start by asking yourself these questions:

• Do any common safety behaviors resonate with me?
• When am I most anxious? (Examples: presentations, meeting new people, large groups, conflict, uncertainty)
• What do I tend to do when I’m anxious? (Examples: ask lots of questions, avoid talking about yourself, talk fast, rehearse sentences, over-prepare, scan for reassurance)
• What feels impossible to give up (even a little)?

Step 2: Understanding the Why 
​Ask yourself:

• What do I fear most in this situation? (Examples: seeming awkward, being judged, looking unintelligent, saying the wrong thing, being rejected)
• What is this behavior protecting me from? Example: Over-preparing protects me from making mistakes or being judged. When we identify what we are most afraid of and what these behaviors do for us, we can start to create a fear protection chain and see the loop of this cycle that keeps our anxiety circulating. 

1. Fear → Safety behavior → Short-term relief → Long-term cost (anxiety stays believable)
2. Fear → Protection Chain Example: “If I say the wrong thing, they’ll think I’m stupid” → I read a script to avoid making mistakes 

• What would happen if the feared result actually happened? Consider asking yourself the worst case scenario if this fear actually did come true. Have you survived something like this before? 

Optional mini-step (recommended): Turn it into a small experiment
​Choose one safety behavior and reduce its usage slightly (by 10–30%) one time this week. Then track:

• What did you predict would happen?
• What actually happened?
• Your anxiety level before/during/after (0–100)
• What did you learn? 

Noticing and understanding safety behaviors for what they are is a powerful first step. Bringing attention to these patterns can pave the way for growth and progress. Next week, we’ll learn the final action steps in challenging these behaviors and facing our feared situations.